It’s been 3 months since I’ve been out of school and less than a week since I’ve graduated from college. You might think that I should have found a job by now. But it’s not as easy as you think. I’m a graduate of Bachelor of Arts in Digital Filmmaking. Sounds unfamiliar? Yes. Because my course is only offered in UP & DLS-CSB. My 3 years in CSB was definitely not easy. I started my course thinking “How hard could this be?” I was a passionate writer, I wanted to share my stories. First term came, and we were already required to make videos. A commercial was my first challenge. I was panicking coz  I don’t even know how to use other editing software aside from Windows Movie Maker. I shot with a video cam. It wasn’t as good as the others but it wasn’t that bad either. 3 years flew by, I experienced a lot of ups & downs with my major subjects. And to top that my thesis was a full-length film. I had 6 months to work on it. Sounds easy? Wrong. Try making a suspense-thriller full length film with 5 other major subjects that also involves going out of town to shoot, to prepare for a film festival in school, a minor subject that you can’t have an absent. To top that the production wasn’t easy. I live in Paranaque yet our location is in Quezon City. Hell. I can’t even go home on weekends. Sleep deprived. Actors backing out. My partner & I got into a fight making it super hard for us to continue. Yet we managed every single thing just to end our hardships. And we did. I promised myself once the term is over, I’ll spend my time resting & just start anew. 3 months have passed and I did get rest. I have spent some of my time helping our other friends with their thesis.

I’m a fresh graduate. Yet I don’t have a freaking idea where & how to start looking for a job that will fit my title. I tried already twice. The first one turned me down like I’m nothing. The second one, told me honestly that they’re looking for artists. Graphic artists. MMA has a lot of students who graduated with me and they can snag that position like an easy meat. Here I am self-studying myself again on how to use editing softwares just like the time when I was in 1^st year. I admit yes, the path I chose is hard & energy-consuming. But in that 3 years I learned to love what I do. I miss the days were I was sleep deprived but my friends are sleep-deprived with me. I miss the days were I just got back home yet I have to leave coz I have to go to school or to another shoot. I miss those deadlines, it may be stressing but at least I’m trying my best to complete something. I simply miss doing something I LOVE.

My brother has photography to back him up. Me? I have nothing. I only know how to write, to edit, to make films. I love learning another language but that’s another story.

My dream is to become a music video director in the Philippines/ or in South Korea. I watch music videos to study them. I know it’ll be hard. So I’m willing to start from the bottom. I’d be good even to start in small productions as a Production Assistant. I’m willing & I tried looking but I could’t find any. I just wish I get my calling soon. It’s driving me nuts, not being able to do what I LOVE.